Wanting what you’ve been told you can’t have.
The word No.
Many find it hard to hear and accept ‘No’.
They may at first say, yes, I understand…this is for the best. The best for us both in the long run. Then days maybe weeks pass and all of that understanding becomes somehow muddy in their thinking and they are back, maybe not directly asking back into your life but walking around the subject looking for an open crack in your heart to step through. Eventually pleading for another chance. Forgetting all the conversations that lead up to the end of the relationship. The clean end. The carefully thought out end with as little casualties of the heart involved. That was your goal, your desire, your hope.
But they’re back. And this time it’s not about you but about them. Their perception of themselves. Their fears and insecurities. Their validation. It’s no longer about the ‘why it ended’ but that you ended it. And in that ending they lost their way because their identity was wrapped up in having you. Their idea of you. Their idea of you both as a couple. Their identity was in how others saw you together. And now they have become invisible in their own eyes.
Their life is falling apart because you are not in it. And that my friend is confirmation that you ‘walking away’ was the best thing for you.
Whether it’s the beginning of meeting or the ending.
When you realize it’s the prize of you they want and not really you (because if they knew you they would understand you and why the two lives don’t blend) then it’s easier to not be swayed by their need of you.
”To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” – Ralph Waldo Emerson